( No Title )
The Mechanics of Emotion (26231 words) by thesavagesabretooth
Athena Cykes has a problem. For years, she built her life around rescuing the man who had saved her, Simon Blackquill. She’d been imagining a fairytale ending. A kiss. A ride into the sunset.
But real life isn’t as simple as a dream. Athena got her kiss, but there was no ending– there was a complication. Bobby Fulbright was suddenly back in Simon’s life in an unexpected twist of fate, and it turned out that he and Simon had been together for a whole year.
Not to mention that there are two more members of the Phantom Organization who’ve been captured that Simon now needs to prosecute, and Athena must defend. Love and chaos in LA. In justice we trust– but who understands the mechanics of emotion?
–
December 27, 12:45 pm
Bobby was ashamed of how relieved he was when he had gotten the text from Simon that he was ready to meet up. No matter how far Robert had steered their conversation with Ray over lunch to mundane and pleasant topics, Bobby couldn’t get over his apprehension and sick feelings of sitting there and lying to him.
No matter how much Robert reminded him that it was the same thing that they’d been doing all year.
Honestly, that made it worse.
They’d given Ray a kiss when they dropped the young detective back off at the station along with a salute, sending him on his merry way, and Bobby had breathed a shameful sigh of relief.
I know how you do it, Robert, but I still don’t know how you do it.
It’s all I’ve known up to this point.
Bobby shook his head and checked the address that they’d been sent, putting it in the GPS and starting that way
I don’t think we’ve been here before, Bobby considered as they pulled up to the apartment building.
No. It’s Athena’s apartment.
Athena’s!! Bobby was taken momentarily aback by the idea of meeting her in such a place of privacy, while Robert didn’t quite understand the problem.
It’s not as if we have anywhere else to meet. Simon and Athena are close. It’s no surprise he asked her.
Bobby figured he was probably right about that as he hopped out of the car, and headed up the stairs of the apartment building until he found the right door to knock on.
He found himself hesitating, and it ended up being Robert who rapped vigorously and unselfconsciously on the door.
The sound of Athena’s footsteps…they had to be hers from the way they clomped hurriedly across the floor rang muffled behind the door moments before it flew open.
“Hey!! Thanks for coming!”
Athena Cykes stood before him, her hair only mildly out of place as if she’d just run halfway across the tiny apartment to open the door as fast as possible.
They saluted and grinned widely. “Of course! It wouldn’t be just to be tardy answering the call! May I come in?”
“The call of…justice?” She put her hand to her chin with a big grin and a wink, before she stepped out of the way. “but seriously…of course! Welcome to La Casa de Athena~”
“My thanks, Athena!” He chuckled, striding in and looking around. “But in this case, really the call of Prosecutor Blackquill.”
“And don’t you dare compare me,” Simon drawled. He was seated on the floor by Athena’s couch with his arms on his raised knees.
Athena chuckled, waving her hand.
“well…that’s almost the—” she froze. “oh shoot he said DON’T compare him, I’m screwed!”
Her cheerful projection was in full force today, shining through her smile and her tone…which was odd in comparison to only a few days ago.
She led him into the house, past framed photographs and postcards…and japanese mementos on small shelves and frames.
They followed along doggishly after her, glancing around at the knick knacks and mementos.
“This is the first time we’ve been to your home,” Robert remarked politely. “Have you lived here long? It’s well decorated.”
She passed a framed photograph of her mother, the Cosmos team and young Athena…it looked recently placed from the fresh drywall dust near the nail.
She looked over her shoulder with a nod.
“A little bit now, yeah…since , well..” She put her finger to her chin. “Pretty much since I started working for Mr. Wright,” she mused as she led him over towards her couch and Simon.
Halblicht stood by the coffee table and waited to be told where to sit down.
“It’s about as big as mine, I think. Well, maybe a little bit smaller.”
Simon shook his head. “You underpaid detectives and defense attorneys. It’s a wonder anyone takes the job. Sit down, Half Bright.”
They looked to Athena for confirmation.
It’s her place after all.“Oh uh…” Athena gestured to the couch with a smile. “Have a seat wherever you want, you guys want a drink?”
“We’re alright, thank you, Athena,” Robert murmured.
She nodded and put her hands on her hips “and Simon, if you’re so worried about our salaries … maybe you can put in a good word with mr. Wright and uh…the…detective…payment…board?”
With the question resolved, they sat obediently on the couch near where Simon was perched on the floor, and put their hands in their lap
Simon was smirking. “To raise detective pay. Hmmm, that would make me a popular man in the police precinct– but perhaps rather less popular at the prosecutorial office.”
Athena waited a moment and plopped herself on the far side of the couch where she grabbed a remote to toss nervously between her hands.
“And what’s more important? Popularity or….” she grinned widely. “the happiness of your subordinate? And the chance to put in a good word with Mr. Wright while you’re at it?”
Simon waved a hand dismissively. “I’ll consider it. But it’s neither here nor there, for a moment.”
“Well, I guess it’s a little relevant,” Bobby considered. “Since we have to start apartment hunting, salary is a consideration.”
Athena rubbed the back of her neck with a sheepish smile.
“Ah yes…apartment hunting.” She tossed the remote in her hand again, “have you given any thought to that, guys?”
“Oh well–” Bobby glanced at Simon.
Do you think it’s okay to tell her, Robert?
I don’t see why it wouldn’t be.
“Simon and I had briefly discussed moving in together, actually! Though there were no firm plans.”
“Indeed,” Simon shrugged. “Prosecutor salary or no, there are benefits to a roommate.”
December 27, 1:05 pmThere are many benefits to a roommate.
On that, Athena Cykes could agree. It was no surprise the two of them had discussed arrangements before, given their mutual displacement and the…
Difficulties…of using the Blackquill Manor with the looming specter of Aura Blackquill’s inevitable wrath.
So why was Athena feeling so nervous? Her internal matrix had been set on overdrive, trying to determine any emotion at all from the other two parties in the room, all while her own muddled together into the low buzzy hum that was not unlike anxiety yet distinctly more vague and unpleasant.
She had no idea how to broach any of the stuff she and Simon had talked about, so she poured on the big smiles and the projected cheer to stall for time with as many pleasantries as she could wring out of the situation while she waited for a moment.
“Like….half the chores?”
“Like half the chores!” Bobby laughed. She got a ping of embarrassment from him, and he rubbed his neck.
“Tsk,” Simon shook his head. “A roommate only halves some of the chores. It doubles others.”
“Oh no!” Athena clapped her hands against her cheeks “well…how about half the expenditures?”
“On the place of living, certainly. Though there’s the need for additional space to consider,” Simon drawled, “That costs money.”
Halblicht hung their head– now more playful than embarrassed. “Prosecutor Blackquill it’s like you don’t want to be roommates at all.”
“Ouuugh.” Athena threw her hands up “sorry Halblicht! I tried to help!”
She giggled outwardly, internally…her mind ticked away on her conversation with Simon earlier…and the discussion they’d made about their approach.
“Quite the contrary,” Simon shrugged smoothly. “But it’s important to consider the challenges as well as the benefits of anything. Athena and I were discussing something similar earlier today.”
Simon had his own emotions as clamped down as he ever could– which wasn’t very– and she felt a sting of anxiety from him as he brought the topic around.
“H–heheh…yep!” Athena flashed a bright smile. “We were..when we were looking around Aura’s house.”
“Ah.” Halblicht’s expression smoothed as Robert swam to the front. “So you went to Ms. Blackquill’s house.”
“Indeed,” Simon had started to chew on one of Taka’s quills he’d pulled from his pocket. “It’s unsuitable as a residence for us, obviously in the long term. Almost certainly in the short term. But investigating it gave Athena and I a chance to talk on certain matters.”
Athena nodded quietly as she spun the remote thoughtfully in her hand, widget flashing yellow on her neck as her anxiety sparked just a little higher into something registerable.
“Yeah…it’s been a crazy week huh? To think it’s the first time we managed to talk about it was only just today..”
“Yes, we’ve all been quite busy,” Robert agreed. “Am I being invited to ask what ‘certain matters’ you were talking on?”
“Well deduced detective,” Simon drawled, snarky. “You are.”
“Then, you may consider me asking.”
Athena looked up at Simon with a shaky smile. “..I was gonna make a slideshow but we didn’t exactly have time…and Simon kept laughing at me every time I tried to put something together.”
Simon crossed his arms, smirking broadly. “That’s because it was a foolish idea, Athena. And would have required more time than we had.”
His amusement was real– but it was covering nerves.
Robert, meanwhile, seemed to have taken over fully because she could feel nothing from him but calm.
“A slideshow,” he considered. “It sounds like it must be a complicated topic if you’d think it required a slideshow, miss Athena.”
“It’s a pretty complicated topic, Robert!” she brushed her hand through her ponytail with a sigh “also I’ve been told it’s an effective tactic of relaying and visualizing the—”
She cut herself off. This was silly. She was being silly…all in an attempt to cover her and Simon’s nerves. But they’d never get anywhere looping around the topic like this.
“Nevermind! It’s about ah…us.”
“Us,” Robert repeated. “Does that ‘us’ include everyone in the room, or is it more limited?”
“All of us in the room,” Simon snapped. “You lot are ridiculous. I’m not talking about a business venture, Athena we don’t need a spreadsheets or slideshows– although I’m starting to regret not having a prepared speech.”
“Simon,” Robert said slowly. “You know how I mostly don’t have any feelings to speak of?”
“Yes. What of it.”
“You’re making me nervous.”
“Urrrrrgh…” Athena’s head fell into her hands for a moment. “Hhhhh’okay!”
She looked up with a bright smile. “It’s like this…back before we knew you were alive still and…and before Cauli and all of that…Simon and I had a night together…and I confessed some stuff to him.”
“Ahh.” Robert nodded, looking between them. “Bobby is advising me that this was likely a romantic confession, and not, for instance, a murder confession.”
Simon rubbed his jaw. “Ah, an actually correct deduction from Fool Bright. Yes, it was something along those lines.”
“I uh…I think a murder confession would have been a little gauche after I’d just gotten declared unofficially innocent in a homicide trial.” Athena laughed, and rubbed the back of her neck “but no, it was a romantic one…”
Robert glanced down at Simon, and Simon put a hand on Robert’s thigh in response.
“In Cauli, you and I discussed the matter of physical affection between the tw– between us,” he grumbled. “But the rest of the boundaries of our relationship are undefined. Which is a problem, now that I’m not going to die any day now. And you’re… not dead.”
“Ah.”
Robert’s little ‘ah’ was impossible to read.
Athena wrung her hands together and spoke up “I’m really, genuinely happy for you guys. That you’ve worked that out, seeing you re-bond in Cauli was…it was really wonderful. But there’s a lot of things up in the air…”
She trailed off.
She defaulted back on what she’d said to Simon back in the car when they’d finally broached this whole emotional puzzle. “That cramped bed in Cauli was really comfortable.”
Halblicht had leaned into Simon’s touch, and curiously looked over at Athena with a lightly raised eyebrow. “That’s an interesting thing to say. It’s relevant here?”
“It could be,” Simon said. “Damn it, Halblicht, this is half way to a useless question but I’m asking it anyway. What do you want out of our relationship? We talked about moving in together– should I be expecting a ring, or–”
Robert laughed loudly and suddenly, a mirror of Bobby’s powerful, expressive one, but with only a shimmer of the forceful emotion. “Oh now I see why the idea of a powerpoint was raised. So… you and Athena have been together, I imagine?”
“Something like that, yes,” Simon muttered, rubbing his jaw. “I thought you were bloody dead at the time.”
“I’m not mad, Simon. Bobby isn’t mad. He’s… relieved.”
Athena perked up “oh!!!” her nervous smile spread on her face again “he’s relieved? Really?”
“Color me surprised,” Simon drawled, wary.
Robert nodded. “During that conversation you mentioned, Simon, you might have noticed that Bobby has very little experience with dating and relationships outside of the expected, boy meets girl boy marries girl archetype.”
“I had noticed, in fact,” Simon drawled. “Hence my question about if I ought to expect a ring.”
Athena nodded quietly, taking it in…from that description, she knew exactly what they must have talked about.
The classic life script, the idea of marriage , boy meets girl and marries her dynamic that remained loosely culturally enforced around them. It was perhaps the only social norm she had basically forgone and ignored in her single minded drive to save Simon’s life…perhaps because of the already strange mire of her emotions.
“That makes sense, Robert…that’s what a lot of people expect.”
“Bobby seems to have been raised in a particularly restrictive culture with respect to this,” Robert shrugged. “He was quite nervous about the idea of being close with Simon in public–”
“–People stare at you!” Bobby whined, Halblicht’s expression suddenly changing from passive, to an embarrassed grimace. “I want to be fine with it, but it’ll take a little getting used to, you know?”
Simon sighed and patted Bobby on the leg. “Ridiculous, Fool Bright. Utterly ridiculous. But yes, I imagine it will take some getting used to– as will any arrangement we come to with regard to our relationship. We’ve been skirting around the point there, I think.”
“It’s culturally difficult to bring up, Simon!” Athena sighed performatively, before she rubbed her face “I’ve learned enough about people to know that!”
She closed her eyes. “So…so I had talked to Simon about the two of us…I care very much for him too, Bobby…hard not to when I made saving him my whole life. But I didn’t want to stand in your way. Not when I was so happy for you all…”
That was probably the best way to start, with the story and leadup…right?
“That’s very kind of you, Athena,” Bobby said, rubbing the back of his neck. She could feel the waves of embarrassment coming off of him. Robert murmured. “Self-sacrificing, perhaps.”
“It is,” Simon drawled. “She’s a very self-sacrificing person. I wonder whose example she was following? Regardless– now that I’ve served my time, I personally have no intention of being as self sacrificing as that. And I told Athena as much.”
Athena smiled shyly with a nod “…and we talked about that a bit. I know I can be self-sacrificing sometimes, but when we talked I realized that I didn’t want to self-sacrifice here either. I know it’s crazy given the situation , but…”
She chuckled “I care about you guys too, Bobby, Robert…and Simon and I came up with an idea we wanted to run past you….hence me wanting to make a slideshow..”
“Are you going to offer it to me plainly,” Robert asked with a slight amused twitch of his lips,, “or should I use my powers of detection to guess.”
Athena leaned on her hands. “I’m kinda curious to see if you’ve gotten rusty as a detective, Robert.”
“Justice is never rusty, Miss Athena, I assure you. ” Robert grinned broadly– despite the emotional show, it was still mostly him, Athena could tell. She felt the secondary ping of Bobby’s shy embarrassment behind his wall. “My intuition tells me that Simon is going to ask if we mind if he dates the both of us.”
Athena laughed into her hand “basically! You’re basically right there…and well, as I said, there’s something comfortable about a cramped bed. There’s a word for it, you know? I learned about it in Europe, and then more often from helping Trucy at the Wunder Bar…”
“And what word exactly are you thinking of, Miss Athena?” Robert asked, inclining his head toward her.
“Polyamory?” She said with a lopsided smile.
“That’s a good word,” Robert nodded.
“And would you be interested in such an arrangement?” Simon asked, glancing at him out of the corner of his eye.
“Well,” Robert adjusted his suit cuffs thoughtfully. “It touches on something Bobby has been absolutely dying to for us to disclose. We’d better get that out of the way.”
Athena leaned closer, folding her hands on her lap with a puzzled smile. “oh? Really?”
Now Simon turned his full attention to Halblicht, his eyebrows raised. “Do tell.”
Athena could feel Bobby’s anxiety suddenly pinging a fever pitch, low and hidden behind the bulwark wall of Robert’s glossy emotional shield.
“Bobby is feeling guilty, and convinced you may be angry,” Robert said as preamble. “Personally, I have my doubts about it. For part of the time you and we were carrying on our prison affair, Bobby and I also were involved in an informal sexual relationship at the police precinct.
"I see.” Simon’s eyebrows had crawled further into his messy hair. However, far from anger, what Athena mostly felt from him was embarrassment– and intrigue.
Of course, typical for Simon, he left his reply hanging ominously.
Athena flushed a bit, leaning on her hands with genuine curiosity. The emotions in the room pinged through her, washing over her own as she brushed her hair out of her face and broke the ominous pause for Bobby.
“Gosh…an informal sexual relationship at the precinct? Was it with …” She thought for a long moment about the few detectives and officers she knew. “Investigator…Skye? Mr. Detective Gumshoe? Maggey?”
With that, she’d pretty much gone through all the ones she knew.
“I doubt either of you know him. HIs name is detective Ray Hoshino. Initially our relationship began as a solution to a problem. Namely that he was formerly Bobby Fulbright’s neighbor.”
“I see,” Simon repeated. He leaned forward, and his smile widened dangerously. “Robert, let me talk to Bobby for a minute.”
Robert shrugged and Athena was suddenly hit full force with the wave of Bobby’s embarrassment as he wrung his hands in his lap. “Are you mad? Simon, I mean, we never talked about– and I didn’t think that– you know—”
“Silence, Fool Bright!” Simon snapped harshly. Then he laughed and thumped his hand on the sofa. “So– you were worried about me being mad? Why? As Robert said, we never discussed any kind of formal arrangement. Which is why we’re doing so now. Here I was agonizing over having slept with Athena while you’ve been screwing around in the office!”
Athena turned a vivid red, both from Bobby’s embarrassment flooding her system and her own as it pinged in response to Simon.
“Gehhhhahahhhh….” She held her hands up shyly. “Looks like that…uh, resolves nicely? Yay! Nobody has to feel b-bad for sleeping with anyone!”
“Indeed not,” Simon laughed, slapping the couch again. “All that’s left is to tie up how we’re going to proceed.”
“And um, how would you like that to be, Simon?” Bobby asked, poking his fingers together nervously. “I can break things off with Ray if you’d want us to be uh, um, exclusive to you…”
“What kind of drivel is coming out of your mouth now, Fool Bright?” Simon sneered.
Everything but sheer amusement had left Simon’s emotions– they almost overwhelmed even Bobby’s embarrassment and anxiety.
Athena laughed into her hand. “geeze…Bobby, he’s having a lot of fun with this. It’s almost oppressive.”
Bobby rubbed the back of his neck, flushing deep scarlet.
“I can kind of tell. Justice, Simon, I really feel like I’m being laughed at here.” Nevertheless, he smiled widely. “You know I’m not always the quickest on the uptake, can you two just tell me, you know… how you want to proceed?”
“Spoilsport,” Simon snapped playfully. “I propose that we do as we like, sexually. And I propose further that we invite Athena to apartment hunt with us, if that arrangement would be agreeable to the two of you.”
“All three of us live together, huh?” Bobby smiled awkwardly. Some of his embarrassment had faded, but not much.
Athena smiled shyly and rubbed the back of her neck.
“it’s not a bad idea…I m-mean, with the three of us–and especially Simon’s big big prosecutor bucks– we could probably find a place a lot nicer than this, or sleeping on Aura’s couch and spider-filled guest bed until she kicks in the door…”
She thought for a moment, the idea of the three of them living together playing in her mind for a moment. It’d be comfortable, it’d be fun, heck, it’d even make court kind of hilarious when they then went home after the trial.
And it was a way they could all bond in this strange tangle they’ve found themselves. in “if you guys are okay with it, Halblicht, I’m on board for it.”
“A prosecutor, a defense attorney, and a detective, all living together,” Bobby counted on his fingers. “It sounds like the set up for a joke, doesn’t it?”
“Potentially a very funny one,” Simon drawled. “But I won’t push you if you’re not interested.”
“I wouldn’t mind at all!” Bobby said quickly. “Um, Robert will agree to it of course, but I can tell he’s got some reservations.”
Athena scuffed her foot on the ground with a tilt of her head. “Reservations, Robert?”
Halblicht’s features smoothed back into Robert’s expression and he shrugged. “It’s only the same reservations that I have about living with Simon, writ larger. I have no experience living with other people in this way. I may be a poor room mate.”
As he spoke, she felt a low shimmer of real anxiety from him. He was nervous about it, actually nervous. Of course, he had only ever lived alone the last year– he was used to having his privacy. Having to hide, always. And other than that, he had only ever known whatever life had been like as an asset. Athena’s intuition told her that he was likely going over possible disaster scenarios in his head.
She listened as he spoke, and took a moment more to filter the emotions through herself with a pensive hum.
“You’re in good company, Robert…I think, for the most part…none of us are especially experienced with having a roommate. I grew up mostly around robots…Simon had himself and his sister in that big old house…and your situation…”
Sympathy and anger welled up inside her as she thought of the organization and its cruelties upon Robert and his fellow assets.
“Which means if we do this, it’ll be a learning experience, something to work through together, even if we have hiccups. But it’s important to know that…no matter how many terrible ‘what ifs’ go through your head…the reality is as long as we’re all willing, we can make it work…no disasters necessary.”
“I can conceptualize some pretty terrible disasters, Athena,” Robert cautioned.
Simon waved a hand. “And I can imagine terrible disasters if we don’t live together. There’s a word for that, Robert. It’s called catastrophizing.”
“It’s something I’m pretty used to as well, Robert.” Athena nodded and smiled weakly “what if everything goes wrong? What if this happens because of that…but Simon is right. It goes both ways…and if catastrophize, you not only give yourself unnecessary anxiety…but you miss out on something that may be good for you, or bring you joy.”
“I’m sure your advice is sound, Athena,” Robert nodded. “Regardless, I’m outvoted three to one, even if I were going to object. I’ll be interested to see what living with the two of you is like.”
Interested… that was the word Robert tended to use when he was pleased about something.
It brought a smile to Athena’s face.
“I promise…your interest is well placed. If nothing else I can’t imagine it’ll be boring!” She laughed into her hand “…you and Bobby will have to work extra hard to combat Simon and my…design sensibilities.”
Robert raised his eyebrow performatively, and made a show of looking around the apartment. “I’ll lay my hands on some interior design magazines.”
“Hmph!” Simon sniffed. “My interior design is unimpeachable. I think we should go for a prison style decor. Bars and chains.”
Despite his utterly straight face his amusement was unmistakable.
Athena snorted and had to cover her mouth to stifle her laughter.
“And here I thought we could agree on tatami mats and a space motif! I didn’t know you were that interested in bars and chains, Simon!” She grinned at Robert “I actually know a few people we can get some advice from, on that front. The magazines, not Simon’s chain fetish.”
Robert pulled down his sunglasses. “Never fear, Athena. I know exactly where we can source the chains.”
Athena turned pink, and flashed him a broad smile. “well, we’ll have to make it one of our first trips then!” she glanced at Simon with a teasing wink.
“Ghhk!” Simon shook his head. “Perhaps bringing the pair of you together under one roof is a mistake.”
“Too late now, Prosecutor Blackquill. On your head be it.” Robert grinned widely.
The little ping of anxiety that Athena had been feeling from him had smoothed away.
It eased in her own heart…and she found her smile had turned genuine as her joy.
It was an odd situation no doubt…especially with the variables still only somewhat accounted for…but she couldn’t help but be excited and happy with the result.
“You did agree to it, Simon. You’re kinda stuck with us now,” she chirped
“I’ll prepare myself for round two of my neverending punishment then,” Simon drawled.
Halbllicht laughed and clapped him on the shoulder. “You can’t fool us, Simon. We know you’re enjoying it. Right Athena?”
“Oh he’s loving it, Halblicht.” Athena sidled over to place her hand on his other shoulder. “He’s practically glowing with it right now!”
It was Simon’s turn to flush, and he rubbed his neck. “A curse on both of you. I’m the curse, by the way.”
“We could tell,” Robert nodded. Athena felt a shimmer of emotion from him– amusement? Happiness? It was something positive at least. “Now, it seems that we’ve decided how to proceed in the long term. Now we have to discuss the short term.”
Athena leaned against Simon with a hum and a nod. “the short term’s hopefully not as complicated, right?”
“I certainly hope we can at least agree on where to get lunch,” Simon drawled. “Or the future is dire, indeed.”
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