things-antis-say:
man, anon, i’m sorry that you’ve been guilting yourself like that 🙁 i know it’s a tough habit to break — i’ve got friends who react like they’ve just touched a hot stove every time i mention rickorty, even though they’re aware of how the bullying from the antiship community affected their thinking. it’s hard to shake that stuff off. i hope you can find something you enjoy without judging yourself for it <3
it’s important to remember that you shouldn’t feel guilty. changing your opinions doesn’t make you a liar or a hypocrite or anything. at one point in time, you believed in antiship rhetoric, and now you don’t. that doesn’t mean you were lying. think of it as how, at one point in your life, you didn’t know how to walk, and now you do! people change, and opinions are constantly in flux, and that’s ok 🙂
i don’t know if this will help you, like it helps me, but also try to remind yourself that it literally doesn’t matter. (cw: existentialism) there is still a war in ukraine. people in iran are being killed by the thousands for protesting the government. in 100 years, you’ll be dead and no one will remember you except for your grandkids, if you’re lucky. there are things far worse and far more important than what you ship or what shows you like — so go nuts! life is short, have fun
i won’t lie — there are a few assholes in the proship community who will probably give you shit for being an ex anti. but for the most part, yeah, you’ll be accepted 🙂 i have quite a few mutuals who are ex antis themselves
if you’re scared of your friends, then that is already a red flag. and if they drop you over shipping, they were never really your friends to begin with. i know that doesn’t make losing friends any easier, but my philosophy is to just rip the bandaid off and get it over with. it’s better than having to lie and tiptoe around them for months until the inevitable happens, anyway. i would just be honest. who knows? maybe you can even convince them with some of the sources that convinced you!
whatever you decide, i wish you good luck, anon