Thanks for sharing your experiences. I can definitely see how for some people, keeping it down for any length of time can just make it worse. I think it many cases it depends on the person.
The most important thing, I think is that it is best, when possible, to let your big emotions out in private when you can.
People love stereotypes.
They love to put other people in neat boxes with clear identities.
People especially love to be able to put labels on things they think are dangerous, because they think it makes them safer.
It’s instinctive, I think.
People like to think “if this, then that” is always true, because it makes them feel safe.
It makes them feel like they know where the danger is.
It makes them feel like the danger is outside themselves.
It makes them sure that they are not the dangerous ones.
It isn’t true.
Hurting animals is bad. Hurting animals is always bad.
Children do a lot of things that are bad, and hurtful.
Children and learning and growing.
Let people learn and grow, instead of putting them into boxes.
We don’t have any alters, anon, but we do have angry system members. I’m one of them.
Anger is like fire.
When fire is controlled, we can use it constructively.
We cook our food with it, warm our houses with it, ward away danger with it.
When fire is uncontrolled, it is dangerous, and consuming.
It burns food to ash, it destroys our home and our property, it hurts us and the people close to us.
Anger is not bad.
Fire is not bad.
It’s okay to be angry. It’s best when you can channel that anger.
Use your anger constructively. Don’t let it escape you, destroy things, and hurt people.
I think this advice applies equally to plurals and to singlets.
I wish I had a better answer for you than just “discernment.”
You just have to think about it, reflect on it, consider how it feels and what it means to you, and decide for yourself exactly what it is.
Oh that’s really fun! Thanks for the link!
Here’s the clickable version for anyone who wants it.
